Today…

Has been a not so frustrating day for the most part.

For the past few days my productivity in game development activities has been a lot slower than what I would have wanted. I tried to force myself to work on my game during my spare time, but soon enough found myself not getting anywhere with that. I started to wonder about what I really wanted to do and tried to find inspiration in stuff which had previously inspired me, only to discover that it wasn’t really working anymore, which ultimately led me to ask myself if I was no longer into game making as a hobby. If I had to describe it…nothing I was coming up with,creative-wise would satisfy me, everything felt mediocre, and I wasn’t really feeling in the mood to give it the extra which is required to overcome the “block”. Have you ever experienced this kind of frustrating situations?

Either way, I casually mentioned to some of my friends about my inability to “create”. One of them wisely said something along these lines…

If you’re not feeling what you’re doing then you’re probably not really doing what you want?

So that’s when it hit me. I realized that it wasn’t a matter of creative inspiration. It’s just a matter that I’m not in the mood to work on that game for now. Inspiration is a really weird thing for me. I can’t fake it. So I think I’ll just focus on doing things which don’t feel like a chore at any given time. Regardless~ I’ve been drawing today, this is what came out:

I was experimenting a bit with this shading style as a friend suggested. As for the subject, she’s actually a girl I’m constantly redesigning and drawing.(Well the “constant” part doesn’t apply to actually drawing her). You can actually see a version of her from a few months ago if you scroll down a bit if you want!

Other than that I want to share this:

I’ve been working on just about everything to these anime OP mashes. The user has kindly put together and uploaded several mixes, so if you’re ever in search of some high quality anime music to listen to while working, his channel is great for this.

Until the next time~

Memories of another world

It has probably been less than 2 years since I last messed around with RO (The 5 minutes messing around type, where you login, walk around Pront, disconnect and uninstall), but it has most definitely been around 6 years since I actually quit the game.

For me RO ended around the time the last of my friends quit, afterwards, no other short-lived return to RO was quite like the first week I played and experienced that game with said really close friends I had at the time (funny enough I don’t even talk to some of them nowadays, and the ones I still do, we don’t talk as much lol). I guess for me MMOs were about the experiences crafted with other people I cared about. Much has changed in 5 years, and we’ve all walked different paths, but I’m certainly glad I got to experience this sort of thing when I was still 15.

Every now and then, randomly, I still remember those old, silly,relaxing days, grinding and exploring away both with people I knew in real life and only online. It’s funny how powerful MMOs can be to craft social interactions and experiences, It comes to the point where you remember and feel nostalgic about the game not for its features,world or systems, but because of the people you interacted with and brought that world to life.

Personally I’m done with MMOs for the most part, specially RO, as I don’t imagine myself starting out again, not like I want it to be the same as it was back then, but I guess it’s just a. “Been there, done that, and it was good” kind of thing, but along the way, one meets so many people, can’t help but wonder at times, what are all those bastards are up to these days?~ Hopefully something great.